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[17 Jul 2009|09:05pm] |
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Where to start where to start
Nan passed away last night
the funeral is Monday in Dartmouth
I need to get my scripture to read
and the family is coming as we speak
In happier news
I got the job at the IWK
orientation starts on August 1st,
thats about it, I suppose from me
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[17 Jul 2009|12:24am] |
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mood |
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She's gone,
as of tonight
I hope nan, that your finally home
I'll miss you, and I love you
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[16 Jul 2009|02:18pm] |
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mood |
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So... I just realized that I have less then 3 weeks till my birthday
:O
how sick is that?
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[15 Jul 2009|05:05pm] |
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mood |
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 accomplished |
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I've been spending alot of time with nan,
more so making sure everyone has everything they need
She's doing okay, a little more stable
we were able to move her a better nursing home for her needs
on the plus side, she does know who I am sometimes
and we can't go wrong with that.
Thank you to everyone whose keeping her in your prayers
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[13 Jul 2009|12:32pm] |
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mood |
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 scared |
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Well
As we knew before Nan is dying,
today they are moving her to a floor to make her comfortable while it happens
she'll have more care
and be better medicated
I want Jesse here with me
I don't want to do this alone
but he isn't allowed to be here
how many other times will I want him when he can't be here
how much of this will I need to do alone
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[12 Jul 2009|06:01pm] |
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mood |
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 drained |
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So, I had a great trip to Cape Breton
it was a long drive for a tiny trip
but It was good
I think my Aunt Debbie appreciated it
After all we're all the family they have now
so... it was good
Heather looked beautiful
you could hardly tell she was 6 months pregnant
Benita looks great
very pregnant, but it suits her well
Shalen and I went to the seediest little comic store
and ate way way way too much
I missed Jesse alot even if we still talked almost as much as we normally would have
but we did get to talk alot
I think more we've been just... not talking well...
but we had it out today so I'm kinda hoping that will make us better able to communicate
Nan is getting worse
dads going over tonight to see her
I'll pop by sometime soonish not tonight I'm too tired the 5 hour drive is long, too long lol
I think it means I'm getting old :P
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[11 Jul 2009|12:35am] |
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mood |
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awake |
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Well its now 5 hours till I need to get up and go to CB for the wedding
And here I am...
awake
I need to talk to Jesse before bed
and figure out the wedding things
cause It's hard to answer everything with an I don't know
so...
to bed with me
so I can get up and have a shower in the am
and then drive to Sydney
Have a great weekend everyone
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[07 Jul 2009|07:15pm] |
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mood |
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drained |
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one thing gets more under control while another falls apart...
Nan isn't doing well
they think she should go back to the hospital
I hope she makes it till my wedding
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[06 Jul 2009|07:08pm] |
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mood |
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 hopeful |
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Okay so...
the IWK job isn't off the table
they want a nursing reference...
pray that Linda gets back to me :P
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[30 Jun 2009|05:38pm] |
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mood |
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uggg today has been a very very blah day
I'm just
I've been really anti-social
I didn't hear about the job which is probably meaning I didn't get it
which leads me to do I even want to look for another one right now
cause we're getting married in the beginning of August we hope
and he'll be down and I'd like to have the little time with him I can have
and start really doing this stuff I need to do
re-licensing/moving/green cards etc
However as Jeff said it's also possible they didn't get hold of my final reference yet
but I'm doubting things don't work out for me very often
and I fear with Jesse that was all my luck for my entire life...
I read the wedding
it hit a little too close to home
I went through all the stuff from the start of me and Jesse
and I miss the easiness
that feeling that he's all there was
and that was perfect...
we talked for like 6+ hours a day txt'd all day when we weren't talking
now between his school we talk about 10mins a day... with a random txt here and there
I miss it
Now everything is more complicated it's all about future and planning and figuring out everything from wedding things, to when we'll be able to see his family and mine to what he wants to list as his choices for a job, to bases we want to live
I know it's stressful on him, and me and us
I'm just...
sick of it today
I want to curl up in bed tonight and read
instead I have family obligations
However I did get my windshield replaced today
so that was nice and daddy took care of it
which makes me wonder what I"ll do when I'm alone in a strange country and something like that goes wrong.
I mean I know it's as easy as calling someone but...
Dad just did it...
blah
today sucks
lets hope Canada day is better.
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[29 Jun 2009|05:54pm] |
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mood |
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awake |
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As is with my usualness
I have been a slacker with updating :P
I have however
bought a veil,
(just a little birdcage one)
bought Shalen a thank you for being in the wedding present
and nagged Jesse to get me a ring size,
and the papers I need to get the marriage license
I was hoping to hear about the job today, but I didn't which really sucked
Hummm saw my sisters keeper on the weekend...
hated it read the book!
and watched the hangover with Jesse
and I managed to watch the house bunny
mainly cause it's on VOD and free
hummmm I think honestly thats about it in my life right now...
I am boring as sin eh?
Ohhh Aunt Janet is retiring tomorrows her last day we're having a lunch thing
we think...
well we were told not to bring a lunch
it better not be pizza the last time we had that I had to go out and buy bendadryl because without Donna there no one remembered to order one pizza with less sauce :(
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[24 Jun 2009|11:38am] |
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mood |
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anxious |
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http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/as_koreas_nuclear
things like this terrify me...
what if Jesse gets deployed right away
what if he gets sent there...
and
well we all know what I'm thinking
how on earth do people deal with this
he isn't even there and I feel like scared out of my mind
how can I handle it if he is in this situation...
congrats to all my military friends I don't really know how you do it
I don't know how I'll do it
but I do know he's worth it
so I will do it
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[22 Jun 2009|12:57pm] |
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mood |
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blah |
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So I had my interview...
and I don't know how it went...
they seemed to like my answers, and even referred back to them here and there
but... they seemed stuck on the no experience...
but really until someone hires me I won't have any! grrrrr
but I should find out this week I hope it was okay...
I hope I get it :(
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| Happy Anniversary to me |
[18 Jun 2009|09:39pm] |
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mood |
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blah |
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So it's my anniversary, which we decided not to celebrate mainly due to money and the fact that we're getting married in 6-7 weeks...
and we did do a fancy dinner when I was out to see him
Life is kinda falling into place... slowly
I have an interview Monday for a job I would kill to have
I graduated on Tuesday
I passed my national
Now if only the wedding stuff would fall into place
Jesse needs to do three things...
and so far he's done none...
and well I suppose I need to help him with one kinda like he needs to do it... but I have to figure something out first
but one all he has to do is call his mom! grrrrr
and he still
I don't know it's frustrating
I had a long talk with Andrew the other night
and he's shocked I'm willing to forgo wedding
I don't know I think I'll regret it...
not him but the way we're doing it...
even if I know this is really the only way we have to do it
blah I just don't know
which is one of those things I'm not supposed to say anymore
it annoys Jesse that I answer everything with I don't know :P
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[12 Jun 2009|07:29pm] |
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I passed my licensing!
I am officially a nurse!
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[10 Jun 2009|11:11pm] |
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mood |
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shocked |
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So... Nan had a heart attack
she's staying in the hospital for a few days...
but they are kinda worried it's the end of the line...
she's 88...
I feel like I should be more upset...
but she had nothing to do with me till she was too far gone to really remember me
but I still want to cry about this...
I just don't know if thats too much, or too little or...
I don't know
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[10 Jun 2009|09:37am] |
YOU'RE ON MY FRIENDS LIST, I want to know 28 things about you. I don't care if we've never talked, never really clicked, or if we already know everything about each other. I really don't. You are obviously on my flist, so let me know with whom I'm friends!
1. Your Middle Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Movie:
5. Favorite Song or Album:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
9. Do we know each other outside of LJ?
10. What's your philosophy on life?
11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?
12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
13. What is your favorite memory of us?
14. What is your favorite guilty pleasure?
15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarky) - what are they?
17. Can we get together and make a cake?
18. Which country is your spiritual home?
19. What is your big weakness?
20. Do you think I'm a good person?
21. What was your best/favorite subject at school?
22. Describe your accent
23. If you could change anything about me, would you?
24. What do you wear to sleep?
25. Trousers or skirts?
26. Cigarettes or alcohol?
27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? (If you have no idea, just say something crazy, it'll entertain me!)
28. Will you repost this so I can fill it out for you?
29. How much do you want to bet that mengus won't reply to this?
30. Do you say "I love you" first, or do you wait for your partner to say it?
31. Do you have a "wait time" until you allow yourself to say it?
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[08 Jun 2009|06:00pm] |
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mood |
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accomplished |
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So I had a crazy trip
we got a kia septra or something like that... sentra maybe anyway it was a horrible car :P it didn't have power anything
Not even locks which made me realize how lazy I am and those things will be important to me when I buy a new car.
and for my own records a break down of what we did
( Read more... )
So I went to the base to pick him up which I normally don't do I have him met me at the mall cause it's so much easier but we were trying to save money so I said I'd pick him up, however the base wasn't in the GPS and then he gave me the address to the... post office or something anyway it kept trying to take me though the main gates and I couldn't figure out how to get to the visitor parking. So he talked me through it, wrongly but I figured it out and I got there, and got him and all was well.
I did alot of shopping, I bought a dress to get married in, now to figure out the smaller details
As some of you know I was debating if we should wait, but we decided that August, well after a school is the time so I need to get a license and hopefully see how long it will take to get a court appointment, which reminds me I want to talk to Benita about that.
So... yeah I said goodbye and it was really hard I cried... a lot and nows he's freaking out I won't be okay during deployments but what he doesn't get is how different that will be, I think that will be easier then it is now and mostly because he hates where he is now, and maybe he won't them I don't know.
So... yeah thats where things stand right now I hope this weekend was amazing for you all too.
Happy belated Birthdays to Amy, Juju and Jenny-bean
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[01 Jun 2009|09:09pm] |
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mood |
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 frustrated |
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Sometimes when I really need him he can't be here
and that sucks
even if all I want to hear is it'll be okay
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[27 May 2009|10:29pm] |
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mood |
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 distressed |
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Blah, I'm totally having a blah day today
9 days till I see Jesse
which is great,
still waiting to hear from the three jobs I applied too.
I'm annoyed by work atm
annoyed by my new cross stitch so I think I might go tomorrow
and get the stuff to start the navy one...
I'm glad I get to see Jesse we run into this stupid like... wall when we haven't seen each other, and it's been 2 months now... this is the reason we decided that we didn't want to do this anymore. It's... really frustrating and normally right before he sees me he ends up doing lots more watches to make up for the time off he takes while I'm there. So atm we talk for maybe 15 mins a day... with a txt here and there.
I need to e-mail the place about getting a marriage liscence and figure out how to get a court appointment if need be and how long that takes to do, and... figure all this out, it's like the closer it gets to doing it I don't know...
I'm on a deal with Jesse to not say I don't any know anymore, which is really really hard
anyway it's lateish and I'm going to bed so I can wake up at 3 to talk to Jess when he's off. Night everyone.
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